March 20, 2029
Ontario’s move to open public funding for education to any religion has been met with an overload of requests. The government came under fire ten years ago after its old system of having a public school system and a Catholic one was fraught with religious favoritism in a country of multiple cultures and religious beliefs. At the time Premier Doug Ford agreed that something had to be done to make sure every belief was included in the education of Ontario’s students.
“We must give all religions the opportunity to thrive. That’s why the Ford government is going to open up public funding to any religion to form their own school system and open their own schools,” Doug Ford said at a rally. Many thought the option of simply having only one public school system was the more equal option, not to mention the least costly to the taxpayer, but the Progressive Conservative Party felt otherwise.
The situation now is that there are eight different school systems with others on the horizon. “We think this is a great opportunity for parents and students to choose the religion they want to learn from. We’re already at capacity at our school, but are looking to open new ones throughout the province,” said Master Juno Pinkala, Head Instructor at the Academy of Jedi Teachings.
The Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, or Pastafarianism, has just opened a school in Ottawa with a focus on cooking classes, tomato squeezing and a daily pasta lunch.
Others have become worried about the future of a generation of children growing up with what they see as religious segregation. The only interaction students have with each other is through the Inter-School Intramural League, which has seen religious squirmishes started on the court.
For those not interested in having their child in a religious school, the public school system is still available, though the cuts to its funding have led many to look elsewhere. It seems a free pasta lunch is hard to pass up.
This article first appeared in the Leveller Vol. 10, No. 6 (Mar/Apr 2018).
